header('HTTP/1.1 503 Service Temporarily Unavailable');
header('Status: 503 Service Temporarily Unavailable');
header('Retry-After: 7200'); // in seconds, 7200 = 2 hours
This site is undergoing maintenance! The little black box that runs it is being moved to a new continent.
Normalcy (such as it is) is expected to return on Saturday, the 27th of August, 2016.
If NFG's plane comes to a bad end instead, this 503 error will be all that remains of his empire. Sorry about that.
Have a great day!